I want to believe that ego deflators are not out to maliciously diminish others. They simply have the need to make themselves appear larger by making us appear smaller. I also want to believe that they are not aware of the toxic nature of their words and manipulations. Through years of refinement, they have successfully assembled an arsenal of sophisticated ego shrinking techniques.

We can learn to shield ourselves from the damage of their words. It is simply a matter of not reinforcing their efforts; and, if worth the energy, letting them know we’re on to their strategy. The best technique, however, is just to remind ourselves that this is about them---not about us. It is so much easier not to play in a pitiful and potentially potent game.

We also must look at our own behavior to insure that, however innocently, we have not become an ego deflator. Next time we will illustrate superficially benign, yet truly lethal, ego deflating language.

Always love your thoughts---laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal.