Friday she chased her last deer. Saturday she climbed her last step. Catching her breath, she looked at me − she knew. I didn’t.

She was always there. She claimed my daughter, Jackie, when she was a horribly ugly puppy – so ugly we had to call her cute. Later, she developed into a beautiful woman. And then, too quickly, she was an old girl.

She protectively guarded her secret, her rapidly approaching demise. She hid her tumor from us until she couldn’t. She tried protecting us− from what she knew would devastate us.

She didn’t demand anything – yet, savored so much.

She cherished a beautiful day. She’d rather be outside than in. She claimed my soul with her love of the beach. We’d walk together, each standing a little taller, broadly smiling, and simply being. She would have stayed there for ever---I had to gently, sometime not gently enough, coax her back upstairs.

She put up with the babies grabbing and pulling on her ears, her tail. She simply stood still, and when it would really hurt –she walked away, out of their reach.

Her favorite of all was when my boys played basketball. As soon as they put on their shoes and headed out, she knew. She always knew. She ran with all her might up and down the length of the court. Not caring who won – caring only that she could play.

She became ours 15 years ago. She was Jackie’s 9th birthday present. We blindfolded Jackie, and did not remove the cloth until she was standing in a pen amidst a frolicking group of Sheltie pups. There was no choice. Jasmine choose Jackie and Jasmine was ours.

Sunday the vet said we had to put her to sleep. Now?” I gasped. I begged for another week, or day, or hour. “She’s in pain. Her breath is labored. Now.”

It was heart wrenching. She looked up at us with those huge, unblinking eyes. I said goodbye. I told her we loved her. I told her what a good dog she was. I apologized for not being as good an owner, for taking her steady presence for granted.

She said, “It’s OK. I knew you loved me. I loved you. Enough. Please−please let me rest. It’s time."

I could not stay and witness the needle, the final breath. Charles was there. He was always there. Gently, he whisperied soft words of love. And then, she was gone.

Laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

Whether we admit it out loud or not, we expect Miss Perfect to excel. When we mortals excel—we inspire.

Others look at our achievements and see that we refuse to let anything, no less physical imperfections, sabotage our success. #bereal

Most people can walk into another’s office, find out that you both play golf, and form a connection.

Your goal is to walk into another’s office, find out that you both hate how you look in golf shorts, and form a bond. #bereal

I joined the gym. I tried to find one not populated with the “beautiful people”, no such thing exists. So, here I was, surrounded by physiques immune to imperfection.

I met with my personal trainer, Sergio, and closely complied with his instructions for my assessment. He was very positive, looking for any opportunity to make me feel good about my strength and stamina. “Give my five!” he cheered, as I finished some type of contortion that involved a big blue ball.

I started to relax. I stood up straighter, my ego intact. “Maybe I’m in better shape than I thought,” I let myself believe. Now, encouraged, I said to Sergio, “I see there are classes here. Which one do you think I should sign up for?”

Without hesitating, he pronounced, “the silver classes.” Silver, I contemplated. Silver, gold, bronze, I silently reviewed. Not bad.

I went downstairs and took a copy of the class schedule. I noticed that all the silver classes were in the middle of the day.

Questioning the times with the receptionist, she informed me, “Silver is our silver hair classes.” Back to reality, I slithered out the door.

laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

Our flaws have no inherent power. Their only power comes from within. The ultimate effect our imperfections have on our lives is in direct correlation with the power we give them. If, up to this point, we’ve allowed our inadequacies to control, it’s now time to render them impotent.

laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

I just finished reading 5 pages of notes. I got the point; the committee was not able to reach a unanimous decision. They could have said this in 5 words, rather than 5 pages.

We are all inundated with electronic communication. How helpful if we were mindful on the length of our messages.

Take a moment and review your writings? Is there any way you could be more concise? Can you delete some words, sentences or hopefully paragraphs? Could you be more effective by using bullet points?

I have more to say, but, I'm sure you got the point!

Laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

It’s a new year. Turn on the television, walk into a book store, or open a magazine and we are barraged with “helpful” tips to get in shape for 2012 just like we were for 2011, 2010, etc. etc. In fact, it’s almost impossible to escape the call for fitness and healthy eating habits.

But, what about getting our inner life in shape? What about trying to be more charitable, empathetic, spiritual, and non-judgmental? What about taking a new course? How about exposing ourselves to new and challenging experiences?

Ok, it is important to maintain optimal physical health. Most of us try (not always successfully). Let’s not forgot to also try and improve our emotional health. As Golda Meir once expressed, “Not being beautiful was a true blessing. Not being beautiful forced me to develop my inner resources…”

Laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

Unwittingly, we are reminded of the fragility of life. We learn of the death of an old classmate. We witness the suffering of a neighbor. We feel the grief of a friend. Assaulted with reminders of the precious and precarious nature of our existence, we resolve to be present in our own lives.

Yet, how many of our days are filled with “shoulds”? How much of our time are we on automatic pilot simply going through the paces without questioning the destination? How many hours are wasted by being oblivious to our own hopes and dreams?

As the year comes to an end, it’s time to reflect.

laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal

It happened again. I’m part of a group of about 75 people. An e-mail was sent out by our president, congratulating one of our members on a recent accomplishment. The praise was well deserved and appropriate. What was not appropriate, and frankly annoying, is my receiving copies of the 74 other members’ e-mails, echoing the original congratulatory message.

We must stop and think before we automatically hit “reply all” in response to an e-mail. More often than not, everyone on the list does not need to read everyone else’s agreement on the initial congratulatory message. If we feel the need to add our own congratulations, we should send it directly to the member, in other words, we can REPLY ONLY to her.

Likewise, if we wish to voice an opinion on an e-mail author’s sentiments, we may go ahead and do it, but, we must first consider whether the other 75 people on the list need to know our feelings. Oftentimes, by taking just a few seconds, we can distinguish and direct our remarks JUST to those who may be impacted by our reply.

We are all inundated with electronic communications. Let’s make a conscious effort to diminish these intrusions wherever possible and appropriate.

Laura@RealWomenWin.com #bereal

http://www.generalassembly.org/speakers/bio/laura-black

laura@realwomenwin.com #bereal